Satiating My Guilt

So Peeps,

I was going through my blog posts to mainly catch if there are any grammar mistakes and looking for the ways I can express better or improve. While doing that, I came across a blog post suggestion based on the tags that I posted myself in my posts – “Mom’s Guilt Trips”. The Suggestion read – “Parent Guilt” and it got my interest.

I know that Guilt is common to most moms and I just wanted to check what other moms are feeling guilty about and clicked on the blog post link. (To see if any other mom is being as passive about her child’s nutrition as me 😉)

Turns out, the link acknowledges that parents, especially moms, feel guilty about many things while parenting and think it is part of the territory. However, reading further it surprised me to know that the post majorly deals with how to overcome this feeling and it is quite refreshing to FINALLY come across such post.

The two hard hitting points that I took up from the post are:

 “I believe that the feeling of guilt is unhelpful and optional, and it affects our lives in a really negative way as it deprives us of our joy.”

“One of the biggest and best gifts we can give our children is for us to show up from a place of joy and love. Don’t let guilt rob your kids of the best version of you!”

And the second sentence above is such an eye opener for me.

Here’s the complete blog for you to check: Parent Guilt

So, instead of concentrating on my guilt trips, continuously thinking on what I feel guilty about and why, daily, I thought of doing something about what I can do differently to be at a happier place for my kid.

(Although, the post suggests that we should NOT feel guilty about anything unless we are doing something morally compromising. That is many levels ahead for me)

For now, as starters, I thought of just ignoring the guilt actively and consciously, by engaging in something fun and entertaining with my kid so as to not feel as bad about doing other things (which are still out of my patience levels) that I do wrong/not quite right.

After some research on how to engage with toddlers in interesting indoor activities without having to exert lot of energy and getting frustrated (you see I REALLY need to work a lot on my patience levels), finalized handful of activities that I can try with my kid.

Turns out, all I needed was some paints, brush and some drawing sheets. This activity can engage my kid for at least 1 ½ hours in one go – the time during which I could get some small house chores done, feeding the kid done and still have proper time to interact with the kid during the activity.

The activity is “Painting the Walls on the Chart – but not Wall”.

1. Had stuck a bright colored chart on the wall at the height the kid can reach by standing on the ground. (However, my kid wanted to sit and paint.. so, gave him a stool to sit on)
2. Drew a box at one corner of the chart and drew a picture, to which, the kid has to do coloring. Mind you, the color should not come out of the borders of the picture and definitely not outside the chart.

Sticking the Chart on the wall as opposed to leaving it on the ground is a big UP for kids because, it feels like they are painting the walls. This satiates their urge to do their art pieces on the walls. Taking a contrast colored chart to the walls marks the borders brightly.

3. And, finally threw some paints and brush to the kid to paint away.

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Although this 1 ½ hrs is almost the same time that I spend with him daily, engaging with him in a calm and entertaining activity did some good to both the kid and me.

For me: It made me feel good about spending quality time with him without having single shout downs or feeling exhausted/frustrated and in-turn feeling guilty about it. It felt awesome and proud to see my kid painting, maintaining his border promises with the wall and the picture.

For the kid: Good for passing time, teaches him patience (hopefully) – as he tries to paint the color within the borders of the picture and if at all the paint comes outside the border, to giving himself another chance, to be creative and do it right with rest of the picture.

• Tried doing this on a white board (with markers, of course) earlier, but didn’t find kid getting as excited as doing it on the chart stuck on wall.
• I’m now planning to leave one boxed space daily on the chart for him to doodle or to do his art pieces till it is completely filled. This can become his bedroom wall decor 😀

I will post more new activities that I do with my kid, here in this space.

So Mommies, try it out if you haven’t already and leave comments on how it goes. Also suggest other activities you are doing with your kids.

Have Fun.. until next activity!! 😀